st. patrick’s day

I went to court today with my friend Nermin from work to watch one of the attorneys from our office do his best Alan Shore closing.  (If you don’t know who Alan Shore is, Google “Boston Legal” and watch a few episodes from the second or third season.  He’s worth it.)

On our drive in, we passed bars and pubs full of young people all dressed in green, celebrating and drinking.  Since the weather was so nice, many bars had their outside areas open, and the streets were lined with groups of people walking from one bar or party to another.    I was a little surprised at the numbers that were out partying considering that it was only 12:30 in the afternoon.  Were these all students or were that many people skipping work?  And if they were – how were they getting away with it?  Inquiring minds want to know.

I guess I just don’t get St. Patrick’s Day.  Most cultural celebrations are exactly that- cultural celebrations.  But on March 17th, suddenly everyone is Irish.  I could be wrong, but I’m pretty sure that Mr. Wojehowski and Mrs. Goldstein aren’t really Irish.  But everyone puts on their bright green “Kiss Me, I’m Irish” t-shirts, and before you can say begorrah, you’re looking for leprechauns at every corner.

I realize that the big draw is the green beer.   Thing #2 I don’t get.  Does beer taste better dyed green?  Not being a beer drinker (I’m more of a wine person) I don’t know, but I do know food coloring is basically tasteless.  So maybe it’s the power of suggestion.  I have also heard of green eggs and green beer-batter pancakes for breakfast.  I do not like them on a lake, I do not like them with the snakes, I do not like green eggs and pancakes, I do not like them – that’s the breaks.

Thing #3 I don’t get.  Who is St. Patrick?  I kind of vaguely remember a story about him driving all the snakes out of Ireland by playing a flute.  Was he a real person or a legend?  If he was a real person and good enough to be made a saint, would he like people honoring his name and his day by getting drunk?  Would a better way to honor St. Patrick be spending the day exterminating snakes?  Or learning the flute?  Or eating green eggs and pancakes?

Thing #4 I don’t get- There are lots of other saints.  Why don’t people gather together and drink all day for them?  On the other hand, why gather together and drink all day for a saint at all?  That just strikes me as strange.  It’s kind of like office Christmas parties.  Hey- let’s celebrate the birth of our Savior with an open bar.  We know we’ve done a good enough job celebrating when we throw up.

Thing #5 I don’t get – what do corned beef and cabbage have to do with anything?

I guess the answer to all  my questions is simply – people like to party and have fun and they will use any reason to do it.  Personally, I’m going to start a new holiday.  It’s going to be called “Clean Scan Day”, and I expect to start it in about two weeks.  I don’t plan to get drunk, because that’s not me, but I do plan to celebrate hard and happy.  I think it’s going to be as worthy of celebrating as playing a flute to snakes.

At least to Sam and me.

 

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One thought on “st. patrick’s day

  1. Ahhh & a lass after me own heart! One with some common sense! And for the minds that want to know St Patrick did NOT drive any snakes out of Ireland! Keep driving the cancer cells out & I’ll celebrate with a cup of good strong coffee with a dab of Bailey’s Irish Cream in it when I hear you have a clear scan!
    Love Ya-Viv

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